What constitutes a good Master

There are a lot of Masters in the "BDSM" world. Natural and session Masters, tall and short ones. Some more strict than others. Some with more experience than others. Some with a rubber fetish other with a sneaker fetish. They are a lot of different Masters types. But what constitutes a good Master?

Of course you have to look on different situations. But there are some points which are omnipresent.

1. He is able to read the body language!
   One of the most important things is that the Master can read the natural body language of the slave. A good Master has to read his slaves without talking to him. I see when my slaves are reaching their limit or in what kind of mood they are, without talking to them. Upon that I lead them and decide my next action. When I see that a slave is struggling with a situation but wants to proof he can handle it, he receives a praise for that and believe me the slave will notice that you "read" him and will be very thankful for it!
   All slaves are different and to read their body language supports me of understanding what kind of slave kneels before me. If I want to punish a slave and I notice that the way I choose to punish him gives him more lust then "suffer", I will change the kind of punishment. But also if I see that a slaves like to lick sneaks, I take that to my advantages and let him only lick them, if he serves me properly!
2. He has empathy.
   I know this sounds in the first moment weird but it correlates with reading the body language. You can only read body language at an advanced level if you understand yourself and in the next step your slave. Therefore you need empathy. That does not mean that you have to feel sorry for giving your slave the crop or to tie him up in a stress position! BDSM has more to do with psychologies than other stuff!
   
   My tip for all Master who want to improve that skill: Let your slave write a diary after he served you. Order him also to write about his feelings and give him immunity about the lines he writes! This is very important! Otherwise he fears perhaps consequences and you will not get the feedback you need! Then compare it with your impression and how you "read" him and by the way you get a good impression about his mind set!
   Of course your slave will perhaps write that he suffered, hated something or did not like a specific situation. If you read him in this situation correctly (empathy) and you wanted him to suffer, everything is fine! As long as you crossed no red line of course!
   It is about the Master, not about the slave, but the Master has to be aware about the feeling/mood and lead the slave also in a "psychologically" way, not only in a "physically" way.
   
   
3. He does not get everything he wants.
   Body language and empathy brings us to the next point: A good Master does not get everything he wants (or not immediately). He adapts to the level of the slave and trains him patiently! No slave falls just from heaven, and also no Master! In this post you can read that I needed several years to train the ass of my slave so that he is capable of receiving plugs or getting fucked. But I told him that this will be a part of his slavery and that I will train him.
   
   
4.  Communication.
   A good Master communicates with his slaves and listens to them. Of course the slaves have to show their respect and be submissive. When a slave tells that something was really hard and explains why, a good Master listens and try to understand the slave. He will use this information to support the slave the next time he is in that situation. If I take the example above where my slave was not able to take plugs or getting fucked he clearly communicated with me. I let him know that this would be a part of his slavery and that he can not choose. If I owe him, his ass is also mine, but I said I will take special care and time for that. Communication was a essential part to train him in this matter. Such things can of course challenge the slave, but you as his Master are responsible to not overburden/overwhelm him! This can only be achived if you have a dialogue with your slave!

If you have any question or comments about this post let me know in the comment below.

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Blogentry #059