How permanent chastity improved my life this year and other reflections on 2021

At the end of one year it is time to reflect on the last 12 months. They have been difficult for many of us for sure but I hope they also brought you some happy and good moments. 

Molding a slave

Soon it will be over a decade that I own my slave object. That means I am molding him to my needs and guide him deeper into his submission and this since soon over ten years. But what exactly means to mold and train a slave? What is the essential part of molding a slave and what exactly do I understand with molding?

How BDSM plays with stereotypes and roles of our society

Wether we want it or not our society has several roles, stereotypes and norms embedded. Some of those roles are quite old fashioned and have been fought by a lot of people over the last decades. I really love how one way to play with this roles is BDSM and how BDSM does not care about these roles or even more loves to change them in any way we want. For example in many cultures women are seen as the "weak" sex and for a long time there have been pictures that it is the womens role to serve men as housewives and to please their husbands any given time. Now I am really happy to see on twitter and other platforms a lot of women who turn this picture around. They look up the dicks of their husbands, they make it all about their lust and they make their husbands stay at home and take care of the cooking, cleaning etc. I really enjoy these pictures! 

Approaching a natural and experienced Master

I am a natural and experienced Master. I know who I am and what I want. I am sure that this makes a first approach for some slaves harder. Furthermore it is the nature of a natural slave that he does not want to bother a Master or waste his time and I like that attitude very, very much. On the other hand a slave should - in my opinion - be able to attract attention on a "subtle" level. I think it would be wrong to believe that you have to wait in silent until the Master finally contacts you. But where to draw the line?

Showing my slave status in small ways

My status as slave to my Master is kind of obvious. At least when my Master and me are alone. I am naked, wearing cuffs and collar. Even when we are not alone I am still wearing my slave tattoo, I am most of the time locked and all the time chaste. But regardless of that my slave status is quite clear to me and my Master we both also enjoy those small details in everyday life where I can show and proove my inferiority and submissivness to him. 

Love and BDSM

I heard that some Masters can not dominate a slave when they have affection for them or love them. I have to admit I am different. I want to build up a minimum affection and grow a "relationship" to (some) slaves. Of course not the kind of "equal" relationship you think perhaps. As I discribed in earlier blogpost: Once a slave kneeled before me I can never unsee him as something else as a slave. Does that mean I can£t build friendship? No but it is an unequal friendship. Some slaves are good friends, some are more like an object were I do not chit-chat and my owned slave is my husband which I extremely love!

Why I like serving in winter more than serving in summer

As the days grow colder and it gets dark earlier every day we are all sure: Winter is coming!

So I thought to reflect a little bit on my the differences in my slavelife between winter and summer and why I like the winter time more! As you know I am always naked and I am only allowed to wear cuffs, cage and slavechain. So in summer it is great during the high temperatures. But in winter I could get cold more easily. So it is great we have an apartment that is very easily and very efficiently to heat, so that I can stay naked all the time. Of course I can always ask my Master for a blanket when I am at his feet if I am cold, for example when we are watching TV. 

Forcing in slavetrainings

I decided to write about the topic of "forcing" a slave. In a BDSM-relationship or in slave trainings you sometimes force the slave to do or endure things he perhaps does not want to do. It is in the nature of a D/s relationship. Of course there is also a "but" which I want to explain further.

Running errands for your Master

Running errands is part of our everyday life. Between work and family we all have to find time to perform different tasks. The good thing when you own a slave is that you can either order your slave to do those errands for you or you have trained and molded him over the years that he is capable of doing them on his own. At some point he will foresee the tasks you want him to do and will perform them without you having to tell you about them.

Privacy for an owned slaves

Privacy is an import part of all our lives. Having privacy and "secrets" is an import part of our rights. No matter if you are a Superior, inferior or vanilla. So the question comes up: What's about privacy for a slave towards his Master? In todays blogpost I want to discuss and show my view about this topic.

How important are gears and toys in BDSM?

Let's be honest. BDSM gears and toys are expensive and cannot be affored by everybody. Furthermore they need a lot of space in your house and your closet. And if you have many vanilla visitors you are currently worrying how to put away all the stuff so that nobody sees it. When you browse social media you often see the perfect dungeon and Master and slave in very hot gear and you might ask youself if you need more of that stuff and how you can afford it.

Renting out my slaveobject to a Master colleague

You probably read my article about "borrowing my slave to another Master" (link) and "Why I would not rent out my slave, although I find the idea hot!" (link). I recommend to read them first before continuing reading this article. I had the chance to borrow out my slaveobject again to a well trusted and well known Master colleague. Of course, I seized that opportunity! First of all because I have been training and molding my slave for many years and therefore I am proud of my work and like to share it with Masters who see the value and work. Secondly, I believe it is good for the evolution and training of the slave to be sometimes ordered to serve another Master. 

Kissing a Master

A slave recently asked me on twitter if I was allowed to kiss my Master and I want to put some thoughts in that. As you know my Master is not only my Master but also my partner, husband and the love of my life. So of course we share many intimate moments and part of these intimate moments is of course kissing. Depending on the situation etc. I sometimes kiss his feet goodbye in the morning but we also kiss goodbye with our mouths. It is really not that strict. Kissing is a valid and important part of our relationship and as I may say - Master is a great kisser.

Slave contract

I read here and there about slave contracts and I realised I never wrote about that topic. Therefore I decided to dedicate this article about slave contracts. There are some websites were you can find templates with these contracts. So what are the pros and cons about slave contracts?

Having your holes trained

As you already know I am not and I have never been a fan of anal play and I never enjoyed being plugged, fucked etc. But as you also know it is very important for my Master that he also trains me in this part and he made it very clear from the beginning that he would be slowly but firmly training my ass.

Milking and "slave orgasm"

As you all know since this year I keep my slave "absoluetly" chaste. Therefore he does not receive an orgasm. I see and feel that his sexual energy is usefully rerouted and focused on his slave being and his service towards me. His sexual pleasure is to serve his superior. It is important for me to keep my beloved slave healthy therefore I stimulate his prostate here and there. I "milk" my slave on a regularly base but not to often. The goal is that my slave's prostate gets stimulated and emptied without having any kind of "joy".  There are two ways to achieve that.

Appearing as vanilla but still having my Master in charge

There are moments where we have to appear as vanillas and can't live our BDSM lifestyle the way we normally do. This might be because of work, sickness etc. But mostly it is because we are with family or friends or we are travelling and at an environment where it is not so easy to live as Master and slave.

Enjoying the summer

As you probably have noticed we are actually enjoying the summer after a hard "corona"-winter. 

We will be back with new articles in September!

If you have suggestions about topics you want to read about let us know in the comments below.

Have a great summer!

 

 

 

Find us also on Twitter: Follow @MasterHusband and Follow @GaySlaveHusband

Healthy BDSM-relationship

In a previous blogpost my slave mentioned that he finds joy in serving Superiors. Therefore, I wanted to raise awareness about the topic of “healthy” serving and a healthy D/s relationship. I mentioned in many of my blogpost that BDSM – especially the BDSM-lifestyle - is a symbiosis and therefore it has to be kept on a healthy level. But what is healthy and what is toxic?

Serving Doms as lifegoal

I was always a service oriented sub. Whenever I was in contact with a Dom I never wanted to get fucked or suck dick, I always wanted to serve and make the life of the Dom better. Only few understood that and only few were able to use and enjoy the services I craved to provide. My Master is one of them. He enjoys that I take care of all his needs and makes sure I take away as many chores from him as possible. This was always in me and I am the happiest slave on Earth that I found a Master who enjoys that also the same way as I do. I did not think that that was possible but it got more intense, especially within the last year.

Guiding a natural slave

When you find a natural slave you will start to mold him and work on him. Guiding him into his being as a slave. Owning a natural slave is a huge responsibility. Of course one of the benefits of owning and molding a slave is that you use your slave for your desires. But keep in mind that you have a kind of a "contract" with your slave - a healthy BDSM-relationship is a symbiosis. He has also desires - "slave" desires which (hopefully) fit to your "Master" desires. The desire to be useful to his Master. The desire to serve and submit. The desire that he can trust his Master 1000%. The desire of being guided into his submissivness - into his real being. I guide and mold my slave since he decided to be my owned slave. I guided him deeper into his natural being as a slave - which I think he was born for! But what means to guide a slave? I decided to dedicate this blogpost to this topic.

Slave luxuries

As I am now permanently chaste I can't work for orgasms anymore. So Master adapted the system of my bonus points where I can still collect bonus points. But instead of getting an orgasm for them I can now trade them for slave luxuries. Master has decided that some things in my life are non essential slave luxuries for which I have to work. Things that are totally normal for my Master or any other free man but not for me.

Evolution of the "slave orgasm"

As most of you know I have strict rules and views about the orgasm or stimulation of my slave. Since the beginning of my Master-being it was for me cristal clear that orgasms are for Superiors. When a slave serves me he will eventually receive stimulation but orgasms are only for special occassions. For the most slaves chastity deepens their submission. I observed that the focus of a chaste slave shifts fully to the Master. It looks like it is given from nature that chastity lets a slave go deeper into his slave-being. I also observed that chastity made my slave more happy about his being as a slave. Today my slave finds his fullfilment and his "sexuality" in serving me and getting used.

How I accepted that I don't deserve orgasms

Some changes are happening fast. Only weeks ago I was writing about how I lost the right to earn orgasms. Since then I have taken an even deeper step into the submissive mind concerning orgasms. I have fully accepted that orgasms are only for free men and especially for Master.s I as a slave have a different kind of sexuality. Orgasms are not for me. They should be nothing I need and nothing I crave. This is quite a change I had over the last years. Just recently it was a motivation for me to be a good slave to earn orgasms.

My slave serving other Masters

I expect from my slave that he adresses other Masters - as well as Mistresses - properly and shows them the respect they deserve as Superiors. Whether in real life or online. It is his duty to adapt to Masters (or Mistresses) he interacts with. As example if a Master likes to be called "Sir" he has to do so and remember that. So in a certain kind of way I demand from my slave to "serve" all Superior as they deserve and I know my slave well enough that he would also do it without my prompting. It is in his natural being.

Advices for my younger self

Overall I am happy with my life and how I am living it now! I had a lot of great experiences, but also made some mistakes in the past. I sometimes think about the past when I was younger and started to explore BDSM. If I could give my younger self some tips on his journey, let's say at the age of 19 or 20, those would be among them:

Putting the slave in a cage

The cage is the symbol of dominance and owning a slave. It represents hierarchy between a Master and his slave. Since the beginning - when I was exploring my BDSM - I knew I wanted a cage for my slave(s). It is the epitome of ownership . As you probably know my slave takes his breakfast in the cage after he served me mine in the morning. It is his time were he can read the news, look up social media and have some time for himself. It is his "free" time within a restricted space which reminds him of his position. Reminding him what he is and to whom he belongs.

BDSM lifestyle and "mood" - from the slave's perspective

Master recently has written about how he lives the BDSM life and how it is not affected from any moods. One user asked my perspective on this topic and if I can eat at the table or wear clothes when I am sick etc.

Why a Master should order slaves to his home

After more than a year of pandemic and with an optimistic view into the future I think the situation gets soon better. Therefore I decided to write an article about my tip why you should order slaves to your home.

 

As a Master I decide where I want to meet the slave. Therefore the slave has to follow. When I meet a "new" slave I prefer to order them to my home - when possible. You are probably wondering why. There are several reason why I do that.

How do I relax as a slave?

Some users recently asked how I am allowed to relax, when they found out I am not allowed to use furniture and I can't lay down on the couch and watch TV or use my smartphone. I am still allowed to relax of course, because relaxation keeps my body and my mind healthy and this way I can serve my Master better. I think I as slave relax different than Masters, free men or even other slaves.

BDSM Lifestyle and "Mood"

On the last "#FindOutFridayBDSM" event on my twitter I got the question what I do when I am not "in the mood". I find this question worthy to dedicate a whole blogentry. So lets dig deeper into the topic.

 

First of all we have to destinguish between "mood" and "lifestyle". Me and my slave choose to live the BDSM lifestyle because it fullfils us - it makes us happy, it satisfies our inner needs. It is our desire to live that way. If you have the desire of owning a pet you choose to live the "dog-owner" lifestyle - going out with the dog, train him, enjoy time with the dog and so on. You did not decide because you were in the "mood" for it, you choose it because it was your inner need which you wanted to satisfied.

Losing the right to earn orgasms

You already know that my Master has been for years and of course still is in control of my sexuality. You might be surprised to hear that even after a long time of enslavement there can be some changes. Until know I could "earn" orgasms by working for them. That meant that I had to do all the tasks, all the traininges etc. and earn bonus points. Over the years Master made it harder for me to reach the points and made the orgasms "more expensive". This way he could control the frequency of my orgasms and make them more and more rare. Normally I would get an orgasm, or a ruined orgasm, some time shortly after I had reached the amount of needed points as a reward. I noticed that recently I actually had for quite some time already reached the needed points but received no orgasms.

A BDSM-relationship is a dynamic construct

If you are living the BDSM lifestyle or you want to have a BDSM-relationship you have to keep in mind that it is a dynamic relationship. If you considering to build up a BDSM-relationship - any kind of BDSM-relationship - it is a dynamic construct. Hopyfully the Master and his slave will evolve (together!), you will deepen your bonds and I am sure the slave will deepen his submissivness - if it is in his true nature.

"Mastercock" and "slavedick". How language affects a BDSM-relationship

We all know the power of language. A right word can ease up a tense situation. A wrong word can end a friendship. I have already expressed some thoughts about language in BDSM-context, for example how to address a Master and how to communicate right on social media. This time I want to focus on the use of words in our BDSM-relationship. Words matter a lot of course and we have clear rules. Like in many BDSM-relationships the words "Master" and "Sir" are quite important. My Master is by far not the only Master who punishes his slave when he does not address him correctly. I have to adress him as Master every time I wear my collar. If I don't wear my collar I CAN adresse him as Master, but there is no punishment if I don't do so. The rules are clear for my Master and me.

The Slave Terminal 2.0

In the last couple of weeks I worked a lot on the "Slave Terminal 2.0" which I hopefully soon can share with you people! I already wrote an article about the "Slave Termin 1.0" (here). It was my playground to learn how to program combined with my passion to BDSM. As you could imagen the code I wrote worked but with the experience I gained over time about programming there was a lot of improvement. So I decided to "rewrite" the Slave Terminal with my lessons learned with the idea to make it accessible to other Master and slaves. 

Before you continue reading I recomment to read the previous blogentry about the "Slave Terminal 1.0" to understand the main function of the terminal (here).

non verbal domination

Non verbal domination is for me one of the highest and most intense forms of domination. It means that the Master dominates the slave without any spoken words. I want to reflect on how this can work and what it can mean. You can roughly categorize a few types.

Slaves and positive reinforcement

I want to write today about the topic of positive reinforcement in BDSM. When we think about BDSM and how to train a slave we immediatly think of "negative" reinforcement. Using the crop, showing the slave what he did wrong and so on. Of course I use the crop, of course my slave gets punished when he did something wrong - this is all part of BDSM. In a session it can work to only focus on the "negative" reinforcemend. When living the BDSM lifestyle positive reinforcement is as important as negative reinforcement and I believe also in sessions where you have a submissive and devoted (natural) slave it is a important and great tool to use positive reinforcement.

Under HIS boots.

Master and slaves and their boots are obviously a huge topic in the BDSM society and a big turn on for many people. For many it is very important what boots you wear and how you take care of them. 

I don't want to focus on boots in general, there are others who can do that better. But I want to reflect a little bit more on my personal view on boots.

Submitting to a Master

In my last blogpost I wrote about "equal rights" for slaves. I mentioned that I see slaves - who did not submit to me - as equal persons and therefore not as slaves. I want to take up the subject of submitting and show that there are several deeps of submission towards a Master. In my opinion only a small word is enough to show that you are submitting to a Master.

"How shall this slave address you, Sir?" - Appropiate BDSM-communication

Communication is essential. This is valid for every relationship and even more for BDSM-relationships of every kind. All of us know some rules of how to communicate with each other and what we think is rude and what we think is appropiate. It can be a little bit more complicated when it comes to BDSM communication. So I have decieded to talk about some general ideas.

Being a sadistic Master

I realisted I never wrote about the topic of being a sadistic Master. Of course there are a lot of facets in sadism and a lot of factors you have to look at. I believe all Masters are at least a tiny little bit sadists. So lets dig deeper into the topic.

To tie up a slave and then using him for my pleasure makes me happy and of course a sadist. Twisting the slavenipples, taking the slave by his balls, using wax over his body and a lot of other practices which inflicts pain to the slave. So why do I like this? I have to admit: I do not know. I was born with it.

Why I am happy that my Master enjoys my obedience.

I consider myself as a natural slave who wants to please a Master by following his orders to the point. I was quite surprised when I found out that not every Master wanted that.

Some Masters like their slaves disobedient and it took me some time to know why they preferred their slaves like that. I think there are two reasons why some Masters and slaves prefer some kind of disobedience over obediences.

I think reason number one is: Showing or feeling power.

Do slaves have "equal rights"?

I recently chatted with a slave and he nailed it about the topic of - lets call it - "slave-rights". I had the same view about it but I never could phrase it in words. The slave used the term "equal rights but unequal function/purposes".

So yes I am dominating slaves, hitting them with my riding crop, using their slavebody for my pleasure and train them to serve me properly. As I mentioned in my previous blogentries slaves are hierachically below me and have to obey my orders BUT slaves also have "equal rights". For me these "equal rights" refer to respecting the slaves as human beings!

The "joy" of a ruined orgasm

I have to stay chaste all the time. I can "earn" my orgasms, but only my Master can give them to me and only he decides when I receive them even after I have earned one orgasm. In the last years my Master made it harder for me to earn an orgasm and so I have to stay chaste longer and longer. And more often I am receiving a ruined orgasm instead of a full orgasm. 

Serving a Master online

I receive here and there requests from slaves if they can serve me online or if I do online domination. I personaly prefer to dominate slaves in real life. The real interaction - where you build up a Master-slaves bond - gives me the joy which fulfills my inner need to dominate and use slaves. Nevertheless I am a natural Master and therefore I am also dominant online and I expect respect from slaves when they are writing with me in the online world but I don't do "online domination" in form of "online sessions". Yes I give here and there orders to slaves but not in a "online session" way.